Selfish vs Selfless

We live in a time where we tend to be “selfish” instead of “selfless”.

What does it mean to be selfless? What does it mean to be selfish? In my own words, selfless simply means less of oneself. Instead of being focused on yourself, you focus on others. Selfish is when you put yourself first and you do only things that benefit yourself. Total opposites.

As we moved into 2021, I wanted to focus more on being selfless. It’s easy to get caught up in the “me and only me” trap especially when trying to live what we call “your best life.” I find myself getting consumed in “what makes me happy” or “what is it that I can do to treat myself”. This isn’t always a bad thing, and there are times when we should do some self-care and treat ourselves. In fact, 1Corinthians 3:16-17 says “Do you not know that you are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit dwells in you? If anyone destroys God’s temple, God will destroy him. For God’s temple is holy, and you are that temple.” God wants us to take care of ourselves, mind, body and spirit. He wants us to enjoy life.

But God called us to love other people. When asked the greatest commandment, God said the 2nd greatest commandment is to love your neighbor as yourself. (Mark 22:39) God knew that we would love ourselves. Just think about it, “mine” is one of the first words babies say, which is why I believe he made a point to tell us to love our neighbor just as much. When we love someone else, we value them, we treat them like we would want to be treated, and we show them kindness and mercy. It is no longer about self all the time, but instead, you seek to do good for others. 

The culture has created a me-first outlook. “Do what makes you happy” is a common statement. But the danger of that comes when doing what makes you happy, hurts others, hurts relationships, and damages God’s plan for your life. God did not promise a life free of pain, but he promised he would be with us. So there are times when we will be uncomfortable or unhappy for the sake of others. But this makes us more like Christ. That’s the goal right? Love is sacrifice.

In the Bible, we see many examples of Jesus being selfless. In fact, Jesus himself is the greatest example of what it means to be selfless. Jesus came to this earth to be a servant. He loved those who talked bad about him, he prayed for his enemies, EVEN after they beat him and sent him to be crucified. WOOOOOOOOOOOOW!!!!! And then he gave HIS LIFE for us!

There are many verses in the bible about being selfish, but two of my favorites are:

 2 Timothy 3:2-4  “For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,”

James 3:16 “For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice.”

It is very important that we be less self-seeking and more self-denying. We are to deny ourselves and take up the cross daily. It’s not easy. And we won’t always get it right, but when we do, we will be more fulfilled.

What are some ways you can be more selfless instead of selfish?